Zach "Looking for somebody's arms to wave away past harm" Kuhn
Just got back from what could have been the longest night of my life. Ventured up to Chicago to see Coldplay at the sold out Riviera Theatre. We (Greg and Layne who are friends from work and Amanda who is Layne's roomate) were supposed to leave at 4:00. We ended up not getting on I-55 until a little after 5. After stopping at the Dwight Exit for a little Arby's (humorous anecdote 1: I decide it would be funny to quote Milhouse from the Kamp Krusty episode: "I'm so hungry I could eat at Arby's". I chuckle, the 17 year old manager doesn't. He may or may not have spit on my French Fries. As we walk away Greg says "I never got that joke". He likes Arby's.) we hit the beautiful city of Chicago at around 7:15. That's when the party started. As we were cruising down Ashland, some dope stopped to let out his wife, causing a quick stop on our part. We missed the car in front of us (Ford Escort with a jesus fish sticker) by about six inches, but no harm done. Or so We thought.
So we get to the Riviera and all of the sudden there is smoke coming from under the hood and from the exhaust. Greg pulls over in the Thai Super Chef parking lot (which we will get back to later) to discover that there is smoke coming from the engine. He gets a bit freaked out, calls his dad who tells him he is on his way. Seriously. Greg's dad drove 120 miles so that we could get home, but more on that later. Finally we get to the Riviera, which is an Auditorium which probably holds 2500 people. I purchase a 12 oz. beer for $3.75 to calm my nerves and we get to finding a place to stand. The only problem is there is nowhere to stand on the main floor. We are forced to sit in the balcony, in the second to last row. Still a damn fine view. After talking to his dad on the cell phone, Greg relaxes, and the show starts. 1 hour of pure pop bliss. Highlights: "Don't Panic", during which the singer threw his harmonica into the crowd--he was trying to get it up to us but only managed to throw it about five feet. I think it may have hit someone in the forehead; "Everything's not lost", which gets my vote for most powerful song of the month; and the over played but still noteworthy "Yellow", during which Coldplay's soundguy kicked the singer in the ass for throwing his guitar when he broke a string. (Humorous anecdote 2: some high school girls actually asked the soundguy for his autograph while he was smoking outside after the show. He looked like a deer caught in the headlights of a 747.)
After the show, we were forced to wait for an hour until Greg's dad could arrive. We spent this time:
1. Making fun of the crowd of about 100 waiting for Coldplay to board their bus while innocently waiting with them.
2. Pondering whether or not Amanda could use my Driver's License to get into the Green Mill, the bar next door. (Answer: No.)
3. Reading an interview with Jack Black in UR aloud to no one's amusement but my own.
4. Watching the industry people file out with their backstage passes stuck to their coats (look at us, we're important!)
5. Doing sadly awful Ralph Wiggum impressions ("Tastes like Grandma")
Greg's dad finally got there at about 11. He was planning to give us his car so we could get back to school and he was going to spend the night in a hotel and get the car fixed tomorrow. What a great man.
However, Thai Super Chef was coming to the rescue.
After about an hour of trying to figure out the problem over the cell phone with a mechanic, it was decided that we needed some water. Sheepishly, Greg went up to the restaurant who's workers had been cool enought to let us park for the duration of the show for FREE. (Humorous Anecdote #3: the lot across the street from the Riv was charging $18 to park. And it was full.) He asks for a cup of water, they give him a bucket. About ten seconds later, one of the cooks comes out with a bottle of engine coolant, which was exactly what we needed. The car is fixed. We offer to pay for the coolant, the cook says in his broken English: "No. We no sell coolant, we sell food." And walks back inside. Angel.
So after a three hour car ride, 2 hours outside in the cold, a 1 hour show, and another 3 hour car ride, I'm back in Normal with my beautiful bed and my, you guessed it, Coldplay CD.
p.s. if you want to see something funny, go over to holidaymatinee.com and click on the street team logo. I thought black was supposed to make you look skinnier?!?!??!?!?!?!
Just got back from what could have been the longest night of my life. Ventured up to Chicago to see Coldplay at the sold out Riviera Theatre. We (Greg and Layne who are friends from work and Amanda who is Layne's roomate) were supposed to leave at 4:00. We ended up not getting on I-55 until a little after 5. After stopping at the Dwight Exit for a little Arby's (humorous anecdote 1: I decide it would be funny to quote Milhouse from the Kamp Krusty episode: "I'm so hungry I could eat at Arby's". I chuckle, the 17 year old manager doesn't. He may or may not have spit on my French Fries. As we walk away Greg says "I never got that joke". He likes Arby's.) we hit the beautiful city of Chicago at around 7:15. That's when the party started. As we were cruising down Ashland, some dope stopped to let out his wife, causing a quick stop on our part. We missed the car in front of us (Ford Escort with a jesus fish sticker) by about six inches, but no harm done. Or so We thought.
So we get to the Riviera and all of the sudden there is smoke coming from under the hood and from the exhaust. Greg pulls over in the Thai Super Chef parking lot (which we will get back to later) to discover that there is smoke coming from the engine. He gets a bit freaked out, calls his dad who tells him he is on his way. Seriously. Greg's dad drove 120 miles so that we could get home, but more on that later. Finally we get to the Riviera, which is an Auditorium which probably holds 2500 people. I purchase a 12 oz. beer for $3.75 to calm my nerves and we get to finding a place to stand. The only problem is there is nowhere to stand on the main floor. We are forced to sit in the balcony, in the second to last row. Still a damn fine view. After talking to his dad on the cell phone, Greg relaxes, and the show starts. 1 hour of pure pop bliss. Highlights: "Don't Panic", during which the singer threw his harmonica into the crowd--he was trying to get it up to us but only managed to throw it about five feet. I think it may have hit someone in the forehead; "Everything's not lost", which gets my vote for most powerful song of the month; and the over played but still noteworthy "Yellow", during which Coldplay's soundguy kicked the singer in the ass for throwing his guitar when he broke a string. (Humorous anecdote 2: some high school girls actually asked the soundguy for his autograph while he was smoking outside after the show. He looked like a deer caught in the headlights of a 747.)
After the show, we were forced to wait for an hour until Greg's dad could arrive. We spent this time:
1. Making fun of the crowd of about 100 waiting for Coldplay to board their bus while innocently waiting with them.
2. Pondering whether or not Amanda could use my Driver's License to get into the Green Mill, the bar next door. (Answer: No.)
3. Reading an interview with Jack Black in UR aloud to no one's amusement but my own.
4. Watching the industry people file out with their backstage passes stuck to their coats (look at us, we're important!)
5. Doing sadly awful Ralph Wiggum impressions ("Tastes like Grandma")
Greg's dad finally got there at about 11. He was planning to give us his car so we could get back to school and he was going to spend the night in a hotel and get the car fixed tomorrow. What a great man.
However, Thai Super Chef was coming to the rescue.
After about an hour of trying to figure out the problem over the cell phone with a mechanic, it was decided that we needed some water. Sheepishly, Greg went up to the restaurant who's workers had been cool enought to let us park for the duration of the show for FREE. (Humorous Anecdote #3: the lot across the street from the Riv was charging $18 to park. And it was full.) He asks for a cup of water, they give him a bucket. About ten seconds later, one of the cooks comes out with a bottle of engine coolant, which was exactly what we needed. The car is fixed. We offer to pay for the coolant, the cook says in his broken English: "No. We no sell coolant, we sell food." And walks back inside. Angel.
So after a three hour car ride, 2 hours outside in the cold, a 1 hour show, and another 3 hour car ride, I'm back in Normal with my beautiful bed and my, you guessed it, Coldplay CD.
p.s. if you want to see something funny, go over to holidaymatinee.com and click on the street team logo. I thought black was supposed to make you look skinnier?!?!??!?!?!?!
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