Marc
To recite the Pledge is not to describe the United States; instead, it is to swear allegiance to the values for which the flag stands: unity, indivisibility, liberty, justice, and -- since 1954 -- monotheism. -- Judge Alfred T. Goodwin, San Francisco's 9th Circuit Court of Appeals
That's going in my speech for tomorrow. It's one part of my "big finish". I'm arguing for the removal of the "under God" phrase from the Pledge of Allegiance. Down with God.
One. I've just written this in an email to an Australian, but seriously, could that "Where have all the rudeboys gone?" song by Ted Leo be any better? What's that? You still haven't heard it yet? Too bad, little buddy. I've already done all the legwork for you. All you need to do is [CLICK HERE] to download the piece, and maybe let me know what you think. We can get a little two-way action going on here, can't we?
Two. I need another argument to make. If you'd like to get into an argument, specifically within the next five minutes, or maybe just give me an argument, then get ahold of me within the next five minutes. Wait. That won't work, will it? Stupid brain. Hope. Crushed. D'oh.
Threesies. I have to get all dressed up for this stupid speech tomorrow, and I don't want to. Come on. No one cares what I think, do they? So what, the white boy on the far side of the room -- "the one that never talks?" -- yeah, that one -- "the one that always has his head down and his headphones on until the teacher walks into the room?" -- yeah, uh, same guy -- "the one that looks like he may snap if you look at him the wrong way?" -- seriously. Yes. That's the guy. So, what do we care if he tells us that the Pledge of Allegiance is wrong the way it is? We won't, unless ... well, unless he was wearing maybe some nice khakis and like a, um, sweater -- "a gray one" -- yeah, a gray one. If he wears that, then maybe we'll listen to him. But only if he wears that.
Four. Two bucks goes to the first person that can guess what I'll be wearing tomorrow. Or today. It depends, I guess. If you live in Illinois or New York right now, it's today. But if you live in California or Oregon, it's yesterday. China, Australia, and Japan are all almost done with today, and are almost onto the next, which, if you live in Illinois or New York, would be called tomorrow, though if you live in California or Oregon, would be called the day after tomorrow. So, when was then? Just now. Huh? Just then.
Mother Russia. I don't get it.
By popular demand, Three Sarcastic Lies has been cancelled for the remainder of the season. Sorry for any inconveniences.
In the batter's box: "Where Have All the Rudeboys Gone?" by Ted Leo.
On deck: "Sierra" by Cursive.
In the clubhouse: "You File" by Denali.
Riding the pine: the Bloomington-Normal/Peoria Local Edition of CNN's Headline News.
To recite the Pledge is not to describe the United States; instead, it is to swear allegiance to the values for which the flag stands: unity, indivisibility, liberty, justice, and -- since 1954 -- monotheism. -- Judge Alfred T. Goodwin, San Francisco's 9th Circuit Court of Appeals
That's going in my speech for tomorrow. It's one part of my "big finish". I'm arguing for the removal of the "under God" phrase from the Pledge of Allegiance. Down with God.
One. I've just written this in an email to an Australian, but seriously, could that "Where have all the rudeboys gone?" song by Ted Leo be any better? What's that? You still haven't heard it yet? Too bad, little buddy. I've already done all the legwork for you. All you need to do is [CLICK HERE] to download the piece, and maybe let me know what you think. We can get a little two-way action going on here, can't we?
Two. I need another argument to make. If you'd like to get into an argument, specifically within the next five minutes, or maybe just give me an argument, then get ahold of me within the next five minutes. Wait. That won't work, will it? Stupid brain. Hope. Crushed. D'oh.
Threesies. I have to get all dressed up for this stupid speech tomorrow, and I don't want to. Come on. No one cares what I think, do they? So what, the white boy on the far side of the room -- "the one that never talks?" -- yeah, that one -- "the one that always has his head down and his headphones on until the teacher walks into the room?" -- yeah, uh, same guy -- "the one that looks like he may snap if you look at him the wrong way?" -- seriously. Yes. That's the guy. So, what do we care if he tells us that the Pledge of Allegiance is wrong the way it is? We won't, unless ... well, unless he was wearing maybe some nice khakis and like a, um, sweater -- "a gray one" -- yeah, a gray one. If he wears that, then maybe we'll listen to him. But only if he wears that.
Four. Two bucks goes to the first person that can guess what I'll be wearing tomorrow. Or today. It depends, I guess. If you live in Illinois or New York right now, it's today. But if you live in California or Oregon, it's yesterday. China, Australia, and Japan are all almost done with today, and are almost onto the next, which, if you live in Illinois or New York, would be called tomorrow, though if you live in California or Oregon, would be called the day after tomorrow. So, when was then? Just now. Huh? Just then.
Mother Russia. I don't get it.
By popular demand, Three Sarcastic Lies has been cancelled for the remainder of the season. Sorry for any inconveniences.
In the batter's box: "Where Have All the Rudeboys Gone?" by Ted Leo.
On deck: "Sierra" by Cursive.
In the clubhouse: "You File" by Denali.
Riding the pine: the Bloomington-Normal/Peoria Local Edition of CNN's Headline News.
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home