Panaphobic Superhero

2009-08-17T00:16:00.000-05:00

I think this is hilarious.

Tosh.0

Thurs, 10pm / 9c

Daniel's Popcorn Challenge

www.comedycentral.com

Daniel Tosh

Miss Teen South Carolina

Demi Moore Picture

2009-08-11T22:01:00.001-05:00

Can we make sure that someone writes a post on this thing at least once every six months or so to ensure we get to keep the domain name and screw those people who keep trying to get us to give it up?

Remember when this thing actually functioned as a real blog?

Now it's just a post graveyard.

2009-06-17T19:26:00.000-05:00

We're all 30. LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAME.

2007-10-26T10:00:00.001-05:00

Dusting' of Panaphobic Superhero....ahem.

(left: by some nice dude @ Ben's office / right: by STV SLV)
Come out to our Halloween show Friday, 10/26 at the Beat Kitchen w/ Reds & Blue and Tight Phantomz - approach the MSH merch table and ask one of us for your free Halloween mask. That's right, FREE! Quantities will probably be extremely limited, so get yours early. We figured you might be too much of a wuss to dress up - so we bought a mask for you.

We'll also have a great Halloween medley of songs / some jacked up costumes and CANDY CANDY CANDY. Also, check out some classic horror movies as we play!!

This is THE Halloween show to be at!!!

Friday, October 26th - (Late Show)
A Halloween Show!!
MT. ST. HELENS
TIGHT PHANTOMZ
REDS AND BLUE
Doors @ 10:00 pm | Show @ 10:30 pm
$8.00, 18 & Over
BEAT KITCHEN - 2100 W BELMONT - CHICAGO

2006-12-04T11:18:00.000-06:00

OMG HOLY CRAP WTF

SUPER TROOPERS 2

2006-09-12T20:55:00.000-05:00

dude. your version of "l'homme de pain" is so much better. hey.. remember penis fit jeans?? i think they're coming into style. look........

go ahead... click and open it. you'll see.

2006-09-08T13:03:00.000-05:00

The Muffin Man in French according to Google Translate:

connaissez-vous l'homme de pain ? l'homme de pain ? l'homme de pain ? l'OH, connaissez-vous l'homme de pain, avec les marchandises cuites au four pour des filles et des garçons ?

I liked my way better.

2006-08-30T09:21:00.000-05:00

New Lemonheads here!!

2006-08-24T21:44:00.000-05:00

wow, this blog is becoming almost semi-readable again.

2006-08-21T09:24:00.000-05:00

Is it bad that I like The Fray? I don't care. Love it.

2006-08-18T09:43:00.000-05:00

J-Lo's butt may be a pluton but what does that make Uranus?

Boo-ya!

2006-08-16T14:03:00.000-05:00

alright, i'll post. i find this interesting, but you may not.

they're proposing the adoption of a couple new planets into our solar system. read about it here. but it sounds like the proposal is somewhat of a mess-- astronomers all disagree about the term planet and stuff. with this new idea, it could mean there are like 50 other planets-- but they might call the "non-classical" planets plutons. hmm.. sufficient mass + revolution around sun = pluton ...

does this mean j-lo's butt is a pluton?

boo-ya! that's topical humor right there. well, with a j-lo reference, topical humor circa 1998.

2006-08-09T10:00:00.000-05:00

I think everyone's turned into text buddies now. The internet was so last year.

2006-08-08T22:20:00.000-05:00

is anyone ever gonna post here anymore?

2006-06-24T21:36:00.000-05:00

East Coast Killah! Check it!

2006-05-30T21:13:00.000-05:00

Summer of George! website is up and running! Enjoy.

2006-05-26T15:05:00.000-05:00

Could be worse, we could lead the league in trashy fans running on the field sucker punching the opposing team's coaches.

2006-05-26T08:30:00.000-05:00

They lead the league in sucker-punches. At least that's something.

2006-05-25T16:38:00.000-05:00

I wish I could tell you why they sucked, but I haven't watched a game in almost 6 days. I just go online to check the score.

I'm going to the game on Saturday. I'll report back then and let you know why they suck.

2006-05-24T22:36:00.000-05:00

i know why they suck so much:

because they dont have albert poo-holes

2006-05-23T07:49:00.000-05:00

Okay. Brainstorm time. Why do the Cubs suck so much?

This has been the most exciting moment so far this season.

Possible topics include, but certainly are not limited to: Dusty Baker, Larry Rothschild, Jim Hendry, the 2003 season, Derek Lee's wrist, Mark Prior, Kerry Wood, Aramis Ramirez, Glendon Rusch, Jacque Jones' bat, Juan Pierre's on-base percentage, the towel drill, the team-wide home run drought, Neifi Perez, cornering the market on second basemen, day games, the Chicago White Sox, etc.

Please post ASAP.

2006-05-09T08:12:00.000-05:00

Good! I'm sick of paying for insertion every other day.

2006-05-07T14:17:00.000-05:00

I tried myheritage.com with a photo of me.

Jeff Buckley
Christian Bale
Yasmine Bleeth (wtf)
Sarah Michelle Gellar (WTF)

wtf. i was hoping to get the rapper guy from linkin park.

2006-05-05T14:32:00.000-05:00

So the website myheritage.com offers software that allows you to upload pics of yourself and will compare them to celebrities to see which ones you most resemble. I found a pic of Mjarcie from the website of the school where he teaches and uploaded it. According to the site, he looks like:

Filmaker Stephen Soderbergh,

Co-founder of Microsoft Paul Allen,

and
Chester Bennington of Linkin Park.

Not to shabby, Marc.

2006-05-04T10:55:00.000-05:00

So I gave my sophomores an assignment to model a personal narrative essay on the piece "What it Feels to be Colored Me" by Zora Neal Hurston.

What is title of the first one I saw?

"What is Feels to be Emo Me."

Kids do say the darndest things.

2006-05-01T21:28:00.000-05:00

Matt Murton, I hereby give my heart to you.

Sean Marshall, if things go on this way, you can have my soul.

2006-04-23T21:20:00.000-05:00

Annie woke me up at 3:15am on Friday. She told me to get up and get ready because we were taking a trip. By the end of the evening we were in Cooperstown NY.

1936: The First Class - Babe Ruth, Cy Young, Ty Cobb, Honus Wagner, and Christy Mathewson

This is a bust of Christy Mathewson. I am supposedly related to him (great-great uncle?). Can you see the resemblance?

I took pictures of all the Cubs in the Hall.

Ryne Sandberg

Ernie Banks

And I even took a special picture of Stan Musial for Jesse.

The Hall was smaller than I expected, but totally incredible.

Amongst all of the items inside, Annie and I were most impressed by a reinforced right cleat from Greg Maddux's 1995 season with the Braves, and I was personally impressed with all of the old time gear that the players wore at the turn of the century. They must have been incredibly warm on the playing field.

It is worth a trip for any and all fans of baseball. But I'm not telling you something you didn't already know.

2006-04-11T12:26:00.000-05:00

2006-04-11T11:47:00.000-05:00

WTF? Japanese blackface R&B? They're Sony recording artists too, figures.
Gosperats
Another link

2006-04-10T16:35:00.000-05:00

Death (and his bat) appear to be creeping over the P-phobe shoulder.

2006-04-03T22:11:00.000-05:00

Dudes:

Where the hell is everyone?

2006-03-27T15:30:00.000-06:00

Setting - A dreary Saturday afternoon spent in Zook's comfortably chilly basement. Sitting in an elongated oval shape in a camping-style folding chair surrounded, almost completely, by dudes I did not know.

Beers consumed during First Ever Auction-Style Fantasy Baseball Draft - 1.

Major Dialogue Timeline of FEASFBD -
Zook (1:30pm): $24 for Jeff Francouer? That's the "Steal of the Draft!"
Marc (1:34pm): I bid $4.5 on Jose Castillo, 2B for the Pittsburgh Pirates.
Zook (1:45pm): $22 for Todd Helton? That's the "Steal of the Draft!"
Marc (1:56pm): I bid one million pesos on Matt Murton, LF for the Chicago Cubs.
Zook (2:05pm): $9 for Jose Guillen? That's the "Steal of the Draft!"
Marc (2:56pm): I bid $pi on Steve Finley, CF for the San Francisco Giants.
Zook (3:02pm): $1 for Steve Finley? That's the "Steal of the Draft!"

Number of dollar bills extracted from Zook and Scoot in a three-man Texas Hold'em Poker Game after FEASFBD - $30 winning pot, of which $20 was not mine.

Beers consumed during THPG following FEASFBD - 2.

Number of dollar bills extracted from random dudes (with the exception of my bro-in-law, Chris) in a seven-man Texas Hold'em Poker Game in Rockford IL, which ended @ 2:30am that same night, which, I guess, can be viewed as having followed FEASFB - $10 for a second place finish, of which $5 was originally mine.

Beers consumed during Rockford IL THPG following FEASFBD - 6.

2006-03-16T21:08:00.000-06:00

only the people that are following the ncaa tourney will find this amusing... i had my woman fill out a bracket, you know, just to see what happens... and her final four teams???

iona
seton hall
oral roberts
davidson

with oral roberts over senton hall (her spelling) in the championship. she's mad because UTAP (again, her pronounciation) wasn't in it this year.

i think she'll do well in the pool.

2006-03-14T20:02:00.000-06:00

What's the point?

2006-03-10T10:38:00.000-06:00

Seriously. Why do all the Mark Prior-related news items on Cubs.com use this as his picture? He looks like he just ate a grapefruit.

Seriously.

How are we all feeling about the upcoming season, gents? Cubs? Cards? Sox? Whoever.

Personally, I'm optimistic. I wouldn't be a Cubs fan if I wasn't. I want to create a fake milk carton and put an image of Juan Pierre on the back with a caption that reads, "Bring Juan home!" Matt: Could you whip that up?

D-Lee is already looking good in the WBC. Ramirez is resting. I love Murton, for some reason, and feel like he and Cedeno could be the new Walton/Swith rookie tandem of the 2000s. Why Todd Walker isn't given the starting job at second, I'll never understand. But, secondly, why Perez is being considered is even less logical. Hairston should be the back-up to Walker. Neifi should be a pinch-hitter. I'm sorry. I'm just not a Neifi fan.

The rotation is the rotation. I'm personally excited to see what will happen when Wood and Miller are back at full strength. I think I'm looking more forward to Miller than I am Wood. Why not take a chance on a guy that had three straight 14 wins seasons. It's not like Kerry ever did that.

Honestly, though, I just wish that the Cubs would stop using that horrible picture of Prior at the beginning of all the articles about him.

Seriously.

2006-03-02T20:56:00.000-06:00

Matt's new guitar??

2006-03-02T19:25:00.000-06:00

2006-03-01T14:43:00.000-06:00

Like most abusive relationships, Cubs games also involve white people drinking Old Style.

2006-02-28T18:01:00.000-06:00

one baseball team in town wins the world series, but who is it that sets a record for single-day ticket sales the very next season? not the defending champs, no. the other team in town. does that say anything to anyone?? i know, i know, it's only the yuppies and lunatics that'll pay to either get drunk or see the same team lose year after year. or both. but so what? no matter what, it's obvious people would rather see the cubs. it's an abusive relationship, sure. we already know that. we don't win. we know. we get it. what else you got?

also, today i saw a license plate that read: QSRYCHE

awesome?

2006-02-25T01:16:00.000-06:00

Fellas. I have purchased Cubs tickets. Going to two night games so far. May 31st against the Reds. June 27th against the Brewers. Awes. Totally awes.

I have a confession. I am addicted. I cannot help it?

Anyone want to play poker anytime soon? I'm always up for a game.

Stayed in tonight. Wrote. Felt good.

2006-02-22T20:55:00.000-06:00

Matt as a child?

Annie is my wife. She writes well. There's a brief story about an encounter between Bear and I from this evening on her BLARG. I think she's funny.

2006-02-21T07:13:00.000-06:00

2006-02-19T22:55:00.000-06:00

Ricky Williams and the ganja - back together again.

With the exception of injuries that are still healing from last season, we have gone injury-free through four days of pitchers and catchers in Mesa, AZ! This is the year. I can feel it... in my bones.

Bear says, Three day weekends rule the school. Get away from me. I'm nappin', bitch.

2006-02-15T12:44:00.000-06:00

BOO-BOO the chicken. file under WTF.

2006-02-10T12:13:00.000-06:00

I think this is interesting-

By the end of the day I'll have been to work, gone to a funeral, eaten a fancy dinner, and watched a popular musical (Wicked).

Interesting?

2006-02-01T19:34:00.000-06:00

Should I teach Lord of the Flies? I haven't read it since 8th grade. Thoughts, gentlemen?

2006-01-31T17:51:00.000-06:00

yikes. good thing i'm a player.

2006-01-26T11:37:00.000-06:00

Blogs are sooooooo 2001.

2006-01-25T23:35:00.000-06:00

We finally finished the new mt.st.helens video. Click here to check it out. Please let us know what you think.

2006-01-24T22:05:00.000-06:00

2006-01-23T21:12:00.000-06:00

Dudes... DRINK!

2006-01-22T16:28:00.000-06:00

Yeah, NBC--always good to "consider" keeping pieces of shit like Joey on the air whilst cancelling the only show I watch on your godawful network (except for My Name is Earl and The Office, but those shows succeed despite you.) Keep thinking that ER is "edgy" and that having seven versions of Law and Order is going to keep you above the depths that are FOX and the WB. I'm cancelling my subscription. Can I do that?

And fire Chris Matthews for comparing Osama Bin Laden and Michael Moore.

You pricks.

2006-01-20T11:38:00.000-06:00

Rick:

That drawing of you Representing is not quite as good as my original. But I will be at your Metro show. So that's that.

Here's what Rainer thinks of that.

ZK

2006-01-19T14:35:00.000-06:00

Two brooms were hanging in the closet and after a while they got to know each other so well, they decided to get married.

One broom was, of course, the bride broom, the other the groom broom.

The bride broom looked very beautiful in her white dress. The groom broom was handsome and suave in his tuxedo. The wedding was lovely.

After the wedding, at the wedding dinner, the bride-broom leaned over and said to the groom-broom, "I think I am going
to have a little whisk broom!!!"

"IMPOSSIBLE !!" said the groom broom

"WE HAVEN'T EVEN SWEPT TOGETHER!"

thanks mom.

2006-01-16T13:33:00.000-06:00

We've been working hard on the album. We've realized that, without headbands, it's hard to find the pocket. We find the pocket when we where headbands.

Bears suck. Cubs suck. Bulls suck.

Zach and Ry's child - the Nuhr - is adorable. He makes the coolest sound when he gets fussy.

I won at poker last night after the Bears game. That makes it two in a row.

Rick: we'll be at your Metro show.

2006-01-16T12:06:00.000-06:00

2006-01-14T18:22:00.000-06:00

douche patrol:

2006-01-13T16:43:00.000-06:00

dear zach,

rick fast, representing

2006-01-13T15:07:00.000-06:00

Wha? Rumor has it I might be seeing some of you TWICE in one month...Shocking. GO BEARS.

2006-01-13T11:09:00.000-06:00

helllllooooooooooooooooo?

2006-01-11T11:39:00.000-06:00

{o,o}
|)__) - hoot
-"-"-

2006-01-10T11:03:00.000-06:00

where the fuck is everyone?

2006-01-04T17:08:00.000-06:00

hmmmm.

2006-01-01T13:14:00.000-06:00

It may be 2006...but to me, it'll always be nineteennaughtynow...

2005-12-27T23:49:00.000-06:00

EVERYONE! we're hosting a party at our apartment on NYE... FYI. i think we;re gonna get a keg.

2005-12-27T15:26:00.000-06:00

ok sick of looking at THAT.

shit like this makes me realize i need a new line of work.

2005-12-25T07:01:00.000-06:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

2005-12-23T11:56:00.000-06:00

2005-12-23T11:49:00.000-06:00

ATTN: TEACHERS (GREATEST AMERICAN HEROES)

check this out... best passing research paper i have ever read in my life. this kid is a genius.

2005-12-21T17:30:00.000-06:00

ATTN QZA: AWESOME

2005-12-21T14:10:00.000-06:00

ATTN: MAST

2005-12-19T19:55:00.000-06:00

dudes. what is the deal with rainer wearing sox clothes? Seriously. Uncool.

Being at work until 8pm on a Monday... Uncool.

I don't <3 Mondays.

2005-12-19T15:01:00.000-06:00

Rainer's itchin to meet his Uncle Scott, Uncle Mjarc, Uncle Quinn, Uncle Mast and Uncle Rick. He says he'd like to do so as soon as possible, though he's not sure he's willing to drive to Chicago. He will develop a plan.

Meantimes, he likes these songs: "Amazing Glow" by the Pernice Brothers; "Mockingbirds" by Ryan Adams and the Cardinals; "Song for #3" by the Earlies; "Song for Rocky Dennis" by Jens Lekman.

He does not like these songs, no matter how hard I try: "Modern World" by Wolf Parade; "Debonair" by Afghan Whigs; "Web In Front" by archers of loaf.

Today starts X-mas vacation. We took Rainer to get his pictures taken. He cried, mostly, but in between some squawks they managed to get three good ones. The girl taking the pictures was neither patient nor helpful, which is SOP.

2005-12-19T11:50:00.000-06:00

i <3 mondays

2005-12-16T13:35:00.000-06:00

day off!

2005-12-15T10:51:00.000-06:00

noice.

2005-12-12T18:54:00.000-06:00

hi. scooter here. thought i’d chime in since i haven’t been by in a long, long time. oh i’m good, thanks for asking. just living it up in middle school day after day. it gets crazy this time of year, but it makes for interesting times. for instance, here’s a couple things that occurred in my immediate presence today:

3 girls came in 15 minutes late to class because of “drama among other bitches in school.” no pass. just late. yes, their words.

an 8th grade boy told me, “ima jump rope out ma mind.” this was a good thing.

a separate boy spat on the wall. flat out hocked a loogie during class.

while lifting, an 8th grader dropped a dumbbell on her forehead. apparently she was okay, because she told the other 33 students in class what happened, one by one. i for one heard the story 5 times. yeah, i counted.

a boy spilled his entire gatorade all over the middle of a doorway. he let everyone know it wasn’t his fault, though... so of course he didn’t clean it up.

along the same lines, but yet totally different, was the kid who puked all over the floor, then let it run down his chin on the way to the nurse. pizza and chocolate milk were the culprits. oh good god the smell...

some girl asked me, “what’s up with your hair?” her friend later tackled her during a 2 on 2 basketball game. straight up tackled. to the floor. it was awesome.

one kid went to the bathroom 4 times in 25 minutes. not sure why, and I didn’t ask.

alright, i’ve got more but that’s enough. this is getting long.....

2005-12-09T11:08:00.000-06:00

MARC: call me when you read this.

ERRRRYONE: dont forget to come to beat kitchen tomorrow night for the show.

HOLLER

2005-12-07T12:17:00.000-06:00

2005-12-07T10:01:00.000-06:00

Rainer's all like, where are the Cubs at? And I'm all like, "They're going to be fine." And he's all like, "They need to get Juan Pierre." And I'm all like, I don't know, but maybe that's true. And he's all like asleep.

2005-12-06T11:42:00.000-06:00

hahah!

2005-12-02T10:36:00.000-06:00

Check this band out. They just signed to Artemis. Listening to WOXY gets you places.

That fantasy baseball league that I got kicked out of for winning? They're finally paying up. Which means I can finally get ready for Howard 100. And something for the boy. Here he is, in all his glory. That hat doesn't fit him anymore.

Last night, I woke up and he had his eyes open and he was looking at me. He can't stare, really, and he doesn't know who I am in the dark, but he just stared for about ten minutes and then fell back asleep...

2005-11-30T15:12:00.000-06:00

Click this link. Scroll down to #94. That's me. I picked the amount of wins each team in the MLB would have and who would make the playoffs. Had I voted with my head instead of my heart and picked the Cardinals to win 100 games again (like we all knew they would), I might have been in the top 10. Plus the damn White Sox...but 94 out of over 1000 is not so bad. Only one person out of 1000 said the Sox would win it...

Check Rainer BLARG.

2005-11-22T10:14:00.000-06:00

Dudes: Check Rainer-BLARG. Rainer's Daily Index. Pictures will be there on a daily basis, so long as I'm at work.

2005-11-21T12:53:00.000-06:00

i dunno about you guys, but im TOTALLY getting into the christmas spirit!

soooo hot.

2005-11-17T09:27:00.000-06:00

The boy. Rainer Thomas Richard Kuhn. 9lbs 11oz. The doctors first words: "Oh boy, he's huge!"

Childbirth proves three things conclusively: Woman are way tougher than men. Babies are awesome. My wife is perfect.

He's named (partially) after the poet Rainer Maria Rilke. Though we say his name like it sounds in American Engrish: Ray-nur. His nicknames include Bubba, Ray-Ray, and the Nuhr. You can call him what you like. He's awesome, though, so no crude jokes.

You can, of course, buy him X-mas presents. He likes Cubs jerseys and Sirius Radio.

2005-11-15T14:52:00.000-06:00

Congrats Zook and Zookette!

In celebration of your cute, little baby....

I present you with a picture of a big, fat, ugly baby..

2005-11-14T21:21:00.000-06:00

Way to spread the seed. Congrats to both at Team K!

2005-11-14T18:14:00.000-06:00

CONGRATULATIONS FROM TEAM H!

You did it! Literally.

2005-11-14T17:16:00.000-06:00

CONGRATULATIONS KUHNER!

in commemoration of your NEW HUMAN BABY, here's a picture of a pygmy marmoset baby:

2005-11-12T22:05:00.000-06:00

Know, check it, love it... Presenting a photoblog of sorts:

GNAR Barge

Link me up bros.

2005-11-10T09:13:00.000-06:00

No baby. Three days overdue.

Had to go deep cover for a few days--shall reveal later.

For now, watch Ashlee Simpson curse at and make degrading comments towards McDonald's employees. She's really sorry, she was just having a bad life.

Lots of new records to listen to.

Bye bye.

2005-11-08T21:58:00.000-06:00

2005-10-31T17:58:00.000-06:00

Matt's Halloween masterpiece!!! HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!

2005-10-31T17:14:00.000-06:00

Dudes, beers and meat. My house this Saturday evening. I've got a grill, a big tv, a garage for the smokers, and 2 bars in walking distance.

2005-10-30T14:22:00.000-06:00

Until this very moment, the only complaint I had about living with the Ps was the horrendous commute to the city. That had all changed the instant my father moved my car and for some reason, left with my keys. I am now stuck in my parents house until my Dad gets home. I am fucking BORED!

2005-10-27T14:29:00.000-05:00

"I can't wait for the Sox to go back to the Cell next year and see half-empty bleachers by early May."

I can't wait, either.I liked buying tickets at face value within moments of the first pitch.

2005-10-24T12:56:00.001-05:00

OH. MY. FUCKING. GOD. THIS. IS. SO. FUNNY. THAT. I. CAN'T. BELIEVE. IT.

i'm serious, i'm dying over here.

this is insane too.

KENZO: this is your new favorite band... they cover RAHOWA, SKREWDRIVER, and MAX RESIST!

2005-10-24T12:56:00.000-05:00

2005-10-21T14:31:00.000-05:00

Go Sox. Go Bears.

Watch sports, drink beers.

Astros aren't steers.

...and they're from Texas.

Happy Friday Dudes!